My feelings aren’t my feelings?!
Yesterday did not go as planned.
As soon as I hit the publish button for my post, I started shaking and I started being anxious. I really don’t know why. Either the surgery is stressing me more than I think or I’m suffering from agoraphobia.
I figured I was weak and hungry at first. So I made myself two eggs, a peanut butter toast and a glass of OJ. After an hour I was still anxious and shaking. I figured I was tired. I took a nap. I woke up, didn’t move and evaluated my symptoms. No shaking but still anxious.
I decided to take my mind off the situation and started the load of laundry and the dishes. I sat down to take a break, my mind was a blank and my arms felt heavy. -no more standing tall. I never figured this would happen when I wrote that writing it down would be and feel more real.
I’ll just take it as, it was not meant to be for me to leave the house yesterday. Maybe my senses felt something and by doing what they did, prevented something worst.
I did get the laundry done. Did half the dishes. I did some exercises in my room. And I shaved the beard.
Although it took longer and I didn’t do all that I wanted to do, I did do most of it. The day was not a total bust.
So the first of the rest did not start with a bang!? More like a wet firecracker. The second will get better and so on.
I almost forgot, Joel 1, beer 0.
Have fun!?
J
Would I !? 